


They'd Only Been Apart For a Week

by fromthedepthsofinsanity



Series: First Line - Homestuck Edition [8]
Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Archiveofourown Exclusive, F/F, F/M, First Line Series, Forced kisses, Humanstuck, Soberish!Gamzee, Terrible Breakups, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-16
Updated: 2016-10-16
Packaged: 2018-08-22 15:48:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8291456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fromthedepthsofinsanity/pseuds/fromthedepthsofinsanity
Summary: In which Karkat tries to figure out why.





	

They'd only been apart for a week and already he had a new lover hanging off his arm. With Terezi, once the object of his intense affections, no less. Well, two could play at that game. Eridan wouldn’t turn Gamzee’s head as much as, say, Tavros would have, but Karkat didn’t need him to be the perfect rebound. Hell, he didn’t even need him to be his friend; all he needed was someone tall, good-looking, willing, and handsy with an unhealthy affinity for purple. Eridan fit the bill to a T, even if he was as desperate as he was a piece of absolute, stinking shit. 

It wasn’t as if Eridan didn’t also have an ulterior motive as well. When Karkat came knocking on his door, red-rimmed eyes still glistening with unshed tears and plump lips all aquiver, Eridan saw him as much an opportunity as Karkat did him. He thought Karkat dumb to his plans: win over Sollux’s best friend through a fake relationship, cause a stir either with Sollux’s jealousy or rage, ease his way into Sollux’s life, and before he knew it, profit. Sollux would be in the bag. 

Karkat’s only regret currently was that while he wasn’t ignorant, Eridan very much was. However, if Eridan really thought Karkat felt anything for him and was still using him to his own ends, Karkat didn’t feel all that bad in doing the same. In fact, now that he thought about it, he wondered why Eridan hadn’t immediately tried to fill that little dip in Karkat’s couch where Gamzee’s ass usually sat right when the news of their break-up became viral. The fucking weirdo had probably been hanging outside Sollux’s window too much to think about doing it; it took all his brainpower to figure out ways to get around Sollux’s security systems. Forget about making plans to use other people’s drama for his own means. 

Fuck him. What did Eridan ever do for him other than give him headaches via Sollux’s venting? He had bigger fish to fry. 

Namely the lanky bastard currently pointing and laughing into a shop window across the street from him. 

Karkat’s hands were tight on his piping hot mug, a heat he didn’t even register. His fury was burning far higher for him to notice something so insignificant as blistered fingers. He was on a mission after all. 

It had been Karkat’s idea to come to this cafe (called Hipster Heaven. Karkat would call it Hipster Hell. Clever, clever.) Bonus was Eridan fell absolutely head over heels in love with the place the moment Karkat brought him. Their first date and Karkat was already putting a couple tallies in his W column. Excuse him for a moment as he jumps for joy. 

Being the best fake boyfriend he could be aside, Karkat knew Gamzee’s routine. Every Wednesday, Gamzee would meander his sluggish ass out of his house, go knock on Karkat’s door at eight in the morning, have breakfast, playfully bicker with him for a bit, and then drag him out to do some window shopping. It seems Karkat was right in assuming he would do the same with Terezi. She probably thought it was just the most endearing thing in the world, just like he had when they first started dating and every time after, but little did she know Gamzee was just regurgitating the same tired things he had done with him. 

Unfortunately, Karkat had nothing past this: stalk-  _ people watching with one person catching all of his interest exclusively _ . Somehow, that sounded worse than just saying he was stalking his ex. Didn't matter. Something would pop up eventually. Something even Gamzee couldn't tear his high-muddled gaze away from-

Maybe something not so vomit-inducing as Eridan reaching across the table, pulling his face to his, and giving him a hard kiss that left him with a probably permanent imprint of his teeth on his lips, but it would have to do. First date and first kiss with Eridan. Oh joy of joys. What did Karkat do in an alternate reality to deserve the pleasure? It seemed to do the trick, however, so Karkat would just have to file away his numerous complaints for later. 

“Isn't that Karkat?” Terezi’s voice carried over all other noise, “And… Eridan?”

Fuck. He was not ready yet. 

“Aw, yeah. Lookit Karbro over there gettin’ his motherfuckin’ make-outs on.” 

If Karkat could have gotten away with it, he would grind his teeth. Gamzee didn't deserve to call him ‘Karbro’ or be happy to see him or be fucking happy in general, especially not after dropping him like he was dead weight and immediately moving on. 

He didn't even have the decency to ease into it. Karkat wouldn't  _ care _ if he got another person to hang off his arm; people went on with their lives after break-ups, and Karkat sure as hell didn't own the bastard, but really? Not even a week after and Terezi is right there doing everything they used to do together, no dip in Gamzee’s routine whatsoever. It made him wonder about things, things that made his heart curl and turn blue and his stomach drop so low that his feet might as well start eating for him. 

How long had he been thinking about leaving him? Had Karkat made him feel guilty enough to stay longer than he wanted? Had Gamzee been seeing Terezi behind his back? If so, for how long? When did he even find the time, if that was the case? What had Karkat done that was so terrible that Gamzee needed to leave? Where could he have done better? Everything had been fine on his end. Why hadn't Gamzee told him there was something wrong on his? Had he, and did Karkat just brush him off? Where was the fray in their tapestry?

The questions depressed him, and the more it depressed him, the more he realized he had no one to dump all his feelings on to. It had always been Gamzee to listen to his self-depreciation, pat his back, and pick him up. If not Gamzee, then Terezi, eccentric, crazy, infectiously, oddly upbeat Terezi. Now that they were a thing, Karkat realized he had no more supports, no more dump, no more ears, no more casual friendships. Not to say he didn't have Sollux, but their feelings jams always ended up in shouting matches and reaffirmations. 

Depression worsened depression, and Karkat was quickly hitting rock bottom. Hell, he was out on a date with Eridan “Douchebag” Ampora for shit’s sake. If that didn't signal low, he wasn't sure what did. 

“Hey, man, how’s it?” 

“Oh, hey, Gam,” Eridan spoke, and it finally sunk into Karkat’s head that he had pulled away and Gamzee and Terezi were now standing next to their table, “Ter, didn’t realize you twwo wwere here,” Karkat could feel Eridan’s needle gaze pricking at all the flesh it roams over.

“Yeah, man. Just seein’ what’s motherfuckin’ good.” 

Terezi giggled, and for the first time in a while, Karkat got a good look at her. She seemed outside herself: hair unwashed, clothes wrinkled and clearly Gamzee’s, lips dry and cracked, and eyes blazing red. Clearly, Gamzee’s influence had taken its toll and then some. It made Karkat’s gums ache and fingers twitch with rage. 

Karkat had tolerated Gamzee’s  _ extracurricular _ activities and avidly avoided them while trying hard to reduce his intake, but without him, it seemed his pastime had grown into something of an everyday need and began to roll over onto the people around him. It was one thing to go tumbling down on his own; it was another entirely to drag someone else down with him, regardless of how willing or unwilling they were. 

As if Karkat’s rage couldn’t escalate anymore. There was a somewhat strained but pleasant chatter going on between Gamzee and Eridan, but Karkat’s balloon popped. 

“Fuck you!!” Karkat roared, jumping up from his seat, knocking his table just hard enough to topple Eridan’s’ drink and startling everyone at the cafe and then some, “Who the fuck do you think you are, and just what the hell are you doing, you mile long shit-snake?! You break up with me, get with Terezi, drag her into the cesspool you live in, and have the fucking nerve to act like nothing’s wrong! ‘Oh, Karkat’s in shreds, but who motherfuckin’ cares, Imma just pull his best friend in and fuck him up more! Sounds like a great gogdamn idea! I might do it three more times! Better yet, let’s just all sit back and watch as he fucks up on his own cuz he’s real good at that!’ 

“Well, ya know what, ‘ _ bro _ ’? I’m doing just fucking great! It’s a gogdamn  _ joy _ watching you fuck Terezi’s life up in under seven days while you walk away from what you think are the ruins of your ex-boyfriend’s! But look! I’m with someone else too! In under a week just like you no less! You aren’t the only one who can drop someone like a hot weight and forget everything! Oh, fucking, boy! I was having the best damn time too! With  **Eridan** , and I didn’t even have to get him hooked on anything to do it! Guess it really puts into perspective who the real shit-swilling, life-ruining, cum-guzzling, mother fucking-” 

Karkat didn’t get to finish his tirade (which was a shame really because he knew he had more) and was yanked bodily by his wrist away from the shocked onlookers. He struggled against the pull, but Gamzee had always been the stronger of the two of them. It didn't’ stop him from trying, of course, and he even added a few sharp slaps, hard punches, and digging bites in for good measure. He didn’t care how much Gamzee wanted to avoid a scene; in fact, it made him feel all the better knowing he was getting under his skin. Wherever Gamzee was dragging him, Karkat was gonna make damn sure that every last person within earshot was going to look over and see the spectacle. 

It was unfortunate that he couldn’t be seen longer. Gamzee led him into the store just next to the cafe and straight into the back where a single bathroom waited. Karkat was shoved inside, the door was slammed shut and locked, and Gamzee looked positively murderous. It was the only thing that silenced and stilled him, the dark look on Gamzee’s face, as if sobriety slammed down on him and took everything he loved in one swoop. Still, Karkat’s chin lifted into the air defiantly, and his own face creased with residual rage. 

There was a slight quake of fear that tapped his insides as Gamzee took a step toward him. It took everything he had to not step back away from him. Gamzee had only ever gotten close to blowing up once in the five years they’d been together, and Karkat could still recall every single detail of the event with photo-like clarity. It looked an awful lot like this. 

Without warning, Karkat was grabbed by his biceps in a bruising grip. A shout was on his lips; the tiniest piece of it managed to escape, but it was muffled, eaten entirely by the larger man holding him. Gamzee devoured his mouth. His tongue was driven, fierce, and completely without the sluggishness a high usually gave it. 

And it was what finally made the anger start to drain from Karkat in drips and slowly be replaced by confusion, hurt, and most unwanted of all,  _ happiness _ . 

He wouldn’t be brought down by it though. If Karkat was good at anything, it was holding onto his anger even after he already exploded. He was explosion incarnate, a volcano of passionate rage that never truly slowed. If Gamzee thought everything could be solved with one last kiss, he would have to be ready for an eruption great enough to bring about a mass extinction. 

“Is this what you wanted?” Gamzee’s tone lost all playfulness, all lazy ease and soft growly edges. 

Karkat didn’t know why he didn’t bite Gamzee’s tongue clean off when it coaxed his to dance again. He didn’t know why he didn’t shove him away when his hands went from his arms to his waist. He wanted to say he didn’t know why he wrapped his arms around Gamzee’s neck. He wanted to say he didn’t know why he leaned into the lanky warmth pressing up against his front. 

He knew exactly why clear, fat tears formed at the corners of his eyes and spilled down his cheeks. 

Gamzee asked again when they parted, “Is this what you wanted? Hm?” 

“No,” Karkat wheezed, took a shaky breath, and exhaled it, “Yes. No. I wanna know why.” 

Gamzee looked perplexed, as if the question had never occurred to him. Heartbeats passed, and Karkat began to wonder if Gamzee had forgotten what he asked. It wouldn’t have been the first time, but the moment he tried to restate his question, Gamzee finally answered. 

“Because you weren’t enough.” 

Karkat felt all breath leave him. Every bit of air and space gone in an instant at the declaration. Not enough? That was his reason? He wasn’t sure if that was better or worse than all the self-made answers to all of his questions. 

Karkat would always be the first to say how lousy a person he truly is. Hell, on a good day, he was scum of the Earth, but  _ he _ was allowed to say that, not someone who left without any explanation as to why, got with another person like nothing happened, and pranced around high as fuck and happy without a care. 

“Not enough?” Karkat whispered, one of the only times in his life he had, “That’s all you can say?” He didn’t see Gamzee’s reaction. His eyes were too out-of-focus as his rage started blinding him. He shoved his hands against Gamzee’s chest hard enough to have his back hit the door with a resounding smack, “You wanna know who’s really not enough?! You! You, you, you! How fucking dare you!? I wasn’t the one that forgot our date nights, or our plans every damn day, or our anniversary three years in a row! I wasn’t the one who went out for WEEKS on end with his friends without a second thought toward my boyfriend! I wasn’t the one that left me waiting for three hours at the beach before calling and telling me you weren’t coming on the date YOU set up! I did EVERYTHING for you! 

“I dropped anything and everything for you whenever you needed it! I was there the moment you called! I made plans around yours and gave up on doing fun shit with  _ my friends _ just for five extra fucking minutes with you! That you obviously didn’t even appreciate! 

“What the hell was I even thinking?” Karkat’s voice died down only a little, “You’re quite possibly the worst piece of shit on the planet next to me. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking trying to make a cesspool into a functioning relationship.” 

“Terezi’s managing just fine. Maybe it’s just you.” 

Again, Gamzee’s words stalled him, but this time, it wasn't in any sadness or anger. A smirk pulled at the edges of his lips, and a slight shake moved Karkat’s head. 

“Terezi,” Karkat said steadily, “Is gonna tear you to shreds.”

“I doubt-”

“It won't be soon, but it will happen. She gives people too many chances, but just you wait. She'll see, and you’ll be run through.” 

“Always the coward,” Gamzee unlocked the door behind him, “Having someone else fight for you.”

“Terezi’s gonna fight for herself. I'm just gonna watch. Fuck you,  _ bro. _ ”


End file.
